Judith Kusel: The Quest
March 17, 2022 by Sitara
by Judith Kusel
“We are sum total of many lifetimes and multiple existences in many dimensions and life on different evolutionary scales….. therefore we are not truly what we live here on this planet, for we sink into a deep forgetfulness sleep and then we often sleep our way through life and believe the lies we are programmed to believe.
Nowhere is this truer than in the spheres of Love.
Deep down there is this yearning to find someone who will love us – just the way we are. The fantasies develop, often around the concept of what life is reflecting back to us. It could be in the form of Knights in Shining Armor who sweep us off our feet…. It could the eternal love stories of a Cleopatra and Antony – it could be the never ending search for the realms of the Gods and Goddesses of Love, whose never-bliss becomes the essence of Nirvana itself….
What one really is searching for is whatever would fill us up from deep within… fill up the longing, the void….
Only in essence we are never told the truth – yet, if we truly seek and set out the truth it will find us in the end. For the old equation, as Above = so below, is in essence one of the most vital keys to understanding. The deeper we delve into our inner realms, and that of the eternal infiniteness which is our own soul and soul group and the infinite soul, the more we discover the infinite possibilities of love – deep within us.
Love is essentially a higher frequency band, and it reflects in the vortex energy, which the Divine Feminine brings in. It is the electro-magnetic current which is the life-force itself. It is no accident that the highest frequency energy places in the world, and the pyramids, all work with this same energy, for in essence it is the very same.
The Ancients have left clues all around us, and the clues are incorporated into the Flower of Life, as they are in caduceus, as they are in the symbol of the Tree of Life.
All show us the keys to finding the essence, the Grail, the Holy and Sacred life-force itself. Yet, in order to find the Grail, one first has to embark on a journey of discovery, and that journey of discovery is, in essence, the search for MEANING.
Yet, love and meaning go hand in hand, and therefore the love energy, in essence is what keeps us going, what keeps the flame of hope alive, and most importantly, in our darkest nights of the soul, it is love which leads us home.
In his book “the Search for Meaning” dr. Victor Frankl tells of his experiences in one of the concentration camps of the Nazi’s – where they were stripped naked – all their clothes stripped, all their belongings gone. In this he asks himself what made human beings survive the extremes of gas chambers, or being stripped naked to the very core, of all your humanness, and then to be able to still survive?
He found that those who survived had a cause, a higher meaning, a higher REASON to live, for they something GREATER than the sum total of themselves to hang onto and a vision or quest GREATER than the sum total of themselves.
I remember reading this, some years ago, and then asking myself, what gave my life this meaning, this vision, this question, greater than the sum total of myself?
That, in itself, has become my journey of discovery in these last few years, in this the higher meaning of life – itself.
For the true higher meaning, the true love, the true inner quest, starts from deep within…. It cannot start from without, for other people will always have their own agendas and their ideas about whom and what you should be.
Sometimes when we love someone (and especially women tend to do this), we give up parts of ourselves, in order to please the person one loves. I have heard so many stories in my life of people who gave up close friendships etc. in order to totally become the life of the other. One day, when the partner walks out of their lives, or dies, they have no life support left…. Meaning that circle of close friends and confidants had disappeared, that ability to live completeness within oneself, had somehow gone…
(This by no ways implies that one should not have a close bond, or enjoy that…. Rather that one should never exclude all others and the inner search for meaning – because you started living a life to please another, and lost yourself in the process).
Essentially love and all of the life is a vast energy field. It starts within our own hearts and our physical bodies, our souls, our emotional, mental and spiritual bodies, but most of all; it starts by connecting to that something GREATER than the sum total of ourselves, from deep within.
The Tree of Life, the source of all knowledge and wisdom, and the Quest of the grail, all live there, deep within….. The vortex energy, and its central keys and codes all lie encodified within us too…. That is how we were created – for in essence we carry the SEED of Life, like the TREE OF LIFE, deep within ourselves.
Some people are always searching for SOMEONE to make them happy, or SOMETHING to happen so that this will bring them happiness. They finally find that someone, and find that it is not just smelling the roses, and often feeling of being let down, or their bubble bursting somewhere along the line, comes to the fore. The same with things – when they finally live in our dream house, we find that the void deep inside of us has not been filled, so we search for the next thing and the next to make us happy.
The search for meaning is essentially something which starts with a very simple question and that question is: “Why? Why am I here, at this time and on this planet? What has my soul come in to do, be, and become? What is it that my soul has come to unique contribute to life on this planet? What gives MEANING and PURPOSE to my life?”
Your soul quest, your soul calling, will always be GREATER than the sum total of yourself. It is like that invisible force that keep your fires going, when all the rest of the world are trying to extinguish it.
It is like a frail mother, suddenly finding the strength to lift a car off her child – in that moment the life of child becomes more important to her than anything else, and in that moment she taps into something deep inside of her, which is GREATER than the sum total of her own limited beliefs about herself and her own strength.
When one has this inner quest, all else falls by the wayside: relationships, jobs, those things….. One simply KNOWS this is it!
The Knight goes on search for the Grail. He leaves everything behind him, and he journeys into the unknown, the unchartered, the dangers, the adventures, which will test his inner strength and resilience…. Which will put him through severe initiations, and tests, yet his Quest, his search for meaning – is what helps him to survive and to not give up, until he finds the Grail, and then BECOMES the LIVING GRAIL.
There lies the crux. The journey, the quest is but that which brings us to the finding that inner vortex energy, that higher state of BEING, of existence, of FLOW, and then we BECOME ATONE with it. This is what lifts us into the higher states of consciousness, into the state to be able to experience miracles happening. This is the state where one can operate on a multidimensional level and where the mundane become the magical, the enchanting and extra-ordinary.
The Sorcerer’s apprenticeship, was in essence the apprenticeship into the QUEST, the Grail, the ALCHEMY of the Tree of Life itself, the Flower of Life, and then to BECOME this.
There lie the keys and codes.
It is only in BECOMING the quest, that the quest becomes us, and we ARE what we were searching for all along…. Because when we LIVE the higher meaning and purpose, WE ARE WHAT GIVES MEANING AND PURPOSE to all other life and life forms.
This is the central key.